This is the website for Rachel’s Challenge. I would suggest personally going to one of the events or requesting that the event come to your school, it’s an eye opener and life changing kind of deal.
❤ Annie
Monthly Archives: December 2012
You Can Start A Chain Reaction: Check Out Rachel’s Challenge
It’s surprising, really, how spectacularly and profoundly certain events, certain words, certain feelings and phrases and gestures, can cut straight to our hearts and make us change, make us feel inspired, makes us want to be more than who we are. The presentation I witnessed, crowded into the Chariho Middle School auditorium with hundreds of my peers—fellow high school seniors, and juniors—was one of these moments. The presenter was from an organization called Rachel’s Challenge. Rachel’s Challenge was started by the family of Rachel Joy Scott, the first victim in the Columbine High School shooting.
Inspired by their daughter’s commitment to kindness and an essay she wrote shortly before her death, Rachel’s Challenge began, telling a heart-wrenchingly inspiring story of a girl who made a difference in the lives of many by just being kind. And that was the message of Rachel’s Challenge. Be kind, and “you never know how far a little kindness can go”—Rachel Joy Scott.
Why was this story of Rachel’s life and death so inspiring? After watching the video, and many people in my class getting up and talking, in tears, about a time when someone saved them from suicide, or got them help with an eating disorder, or when someone they didn’t know touched their heart by just being kind. Some may have been affected by the religious aspect, that Rachel talked about knowing she would die young, but I think the most profound part that affected us was just the idea of what people think of you when you die. We, in a way, were inspired to live such a life that people would have stories of fantastic kindness and love we provided. Even though we will be dead, we want people to remember us as fondly as Rachel was remembered. Maybe it’s a somewhat cynical view, doing kindnesses to maintain an image. But people who care that much about what people think of us when we are dead are kind already. We just all needed to focus a bit more. Love a bit more; leave a little wiggle room for being patient and understanding. And that was the amazing effectiveness of the presentation. It inspired kindness, acceptance, and love among peers. It’s a fantastic program, one I would recommend to any high school.
It’s surprising, really, how spectacularly and profoundly certain events, certain words, certain feelings and phrases and gestures, can cut straight to our hearts and make us change, make us feel inspired, makes us want to be more than who we are. The presentation I witnessed, crowded into the Chariho Middle School auditorium with hundreds of my peers—fellow high school seniors, and juniors—was one of these moments. The presenter was from an organization called Rachel’s Challenge. Rachel’s Challenge was started by the family of Rachel Joy Scott, the first victim in the Columbine High School shooting.
Inspired by their daughter’s commitment to kindness and an essay she wrote shortly before her death, Rachel’s Challenge began, telling a heart-wrenchingly inspiring story of a girl who made a difference in the lives of many by just being kind. And that was the message of Rachel’s Challenge. Be kind, and “you never know how far a little kindness can go”—Rachel Joy Scott.
Why was this story of Rachel’s life and death so inspiring? After watching the video, and many people in my class getting up and talking, in tears, about a time when someone saved them from suicide, or got them help with an eating disorder, or when someone they didn’t know touched their heart by just being kind. Some may have been affected by the religious aspect, that Rachel talked about knowing she would die young, but I think the most profound part that affected us was just the idea of what people think of you when you die. We, in a way, were inspired to live such a life that people would have stories of fantastic kindness and love we provided. Even though we will be dead, we want people to remember us as fondly as Rachel was remembered. Maybe it’s a somewhat cynical view, doing kindnesses to maintain an image. But people who care that much about what people think of us when we are dead are kind already. We just all needed to focus a bit more. Love a bit more; leave a little wiggle room for being patient and understanding. And that was the amazing effectiveness of the presentation. It inspired kindness, acceptance, and love among peers. It’s a fantastic program, one I would recommend to any high school.
So Video is No-Go
I tried to do a video (yes, y’all would finally see what I look like), but my software keeps making me sound like a robot and the sound won’t line up with the picture. So I’m afraid its a no-go.
❤ Annie
For Richer or For Poorer: The Division of Class and The Assumptions
Rich people are not all bad. Poor people are not all bad. The middle class is not all bad.
Common opinion seems to go as thus:
Middle Class citizens believe that they get screwed by not being rich enough to avoid tax loopholes but not being poor enough to get “a hand out”.
Rich people believe that they are being taxed too highly when they are “the one’s who create jobs” and “shouldn’t be supporting people who aren’t willing to work their way up”
Poor people believe that the rich people don’t care about anyone else and never had to deal with hardship in their lives.
These are just general statements. The thing is, not all rich people inherited their money and not all rich people go through tax loopholes and not all rich people own five houses with swimming pools and a yacht. Not all poor people suck money out of the system by lazing around all day, not working, illegally coming here, having too many kids, and/or buying lots of expensive things with under the table money while getting free lunch for their children at school. Not all middle class people are bitter, entitled, or hold distaste for those above and below them on the economic ladder.
But these stereotypes hold, and it is stopping our government from reaching a consensus that is best for everyone—hence the fiscal cliff. The real difficulty is that no one conforms to negative or positive stereotypes, or any stereotypes for that matter, so you can’t hold any blanket statement up and make policy based on that—just about the only thing you could hold up would be “Everyone is Different” or “I Don’t Know if This Will Work. Sorry.”
So what do we do? What’s fair? What’s equal? Can we be equal?
The History in Short
From the very dawn of time, we as humans have carried prejudice around, existing in it, dealing with it, overcoming it. The cavemen preferred healthy women. Societies prevailed as patriarchal (or matriarchal) and one sex had no say. Children had to marry according to their parent’s choice. Interracial marriage was banned widely in the U.S. African people were shipped across seas to be slaves. There were mass genocides—of Jewish, homosexuals, those of a different political party, Native Americans, and others. Women were sold as sex slaves. The rich enjoyed lavish meals while the poor starved; the poor enjoyed rebellion as the rich hanged or their heads rolled into the sand, disconnected from their bodies. Republican’s hated Democrats and Democrat’s hated Republicans. Gay people couldn’t marry.
These things, many, many of these things, are still true today.
It has always been us against them, them against us. Somewhere along the lines it became acceptable to hate, logical that someone is better and someone is less, someone is right and someone is wrong. There is only one true thing—we are all human.
Jewish, Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, Deist. Black, white, brown, beige. Gay, straight, bi, pan. Girl, boy, neither, both. Rich, poor, middle class. Underweight, overweight, average—short, tall, no matter. Human. And as human’s we are doomed to be flawed, but blessed to be different, and we must embrace difference and abolish hatefulness and the violence acting it out. No one is better than anyone else. We are merely flawed in different ways. But who we are is not a flaw. It is our lack of understanding for those different than us that must change.
Special, Just Like Everyone Else
I wouldn’t be the first one to say there is a special place in someone’s heart for children and people with disabilities. They show us that things can be done; happiness can be achieved, even when the world deals us some bad cards. They prove that smiles can exist despite having to try harder, being different, and standing out.
In eighth grade, I worked with special education children, mainly other students with autism, during my “free advisory block”. It was very rewarding to work with kids who had learning disabilities, and to see them succeed. I wasn’t very popular in middle school, but to the kids I helped, that didn’t matter. I was just a person, not “Helen Keller” or “Squirrel girl” or “Spider toes”. I was just me, reading a book about whales, or helping with math problems, or baking gingerbread houses.
People with disabilities are not just like everyone else. Because everyone is different. But we all have emotions. Some are better at controlling them or showing them or conveying them than others, yes. But we all feel.
Sometimes people who disabilities don’t have the label over their heads. Sometimes, they are so “normal” you don’t know. Sometimes we think we can spot it a mile away. But we all have hearts; we all are fundamentally human, despite our lives, understandings, and circumstances. You may have some different experiences than the man in the wheelchair, but you may both have an unhealthy obsession with WWII history. He does not pity you for your misfortune at first sight; do not pity him for his. But do not awkwardly try to prove that you don’t care or that you “don’t notice”. That’s silly.
To give an example in context, a speaker came to URI and spoke on diversity and acceptance. He said that it was stupid for people to claim they were “colorblind” or that race didn’t matter to them to the point that they “didn’t notice”. He said something to the effect of “I am a huge black man. “You cannot tell me that I am not a big guy. You cannot tell me that you can look at me and not see a black man. This is an undeniable fact. This is who I am.”
People with disabilities understand, often, that they are different. They understand that this means being different. But avoiding the topic or existence altogether just makes for awkward conversation. You don’t awkwardly avoid the topic of your friend being brunette, or lactose intolerant, or short. Don’t awkwardly avoid this one.
The Anti-Bullying Challenge
In the last post I mentioned something I called “anti-bullying”. By this, I meant that we need to point out bullying as it is occurring. We need to illustrate that it is not okay. Actively do things that are anti-bullying, like calling someone out who is dissing someone or being mean or rude. Because as humans, we sometimes don’t realize our own discretions and how our actions may negatively affect others.
Statistics and bullying surveys, done anonymously, show that a great deal many more people identify as victims than as bullies. In other more encompassing surveys, which determines who is acting as “bully”, “victim”, or “intervener/defender”, several students were surprised to find that their survey’s showed they were bullies. Bullying, officially in definition, is:
Bullying is intentional aggression that may be physical, verbal, sexual, or more indirect (relational). Bullying behaviors also may be demonstrated through technology such as cell phones and computers.
——(The Bully, Victim and Witness, Relationship Defined by Barton, http://www.sagepub.com/upm-data/10945_Barton_Chapter_1.pdf)
This assumes that one cannot feel bullied unless the actions were intentional and aggressive, which is not always the case. Someone sitting alone at lunch every day is in theory bullied, but by who? Everyone there? Only those actively making the choice not to sit there? Herein lies the problem.
Being a bully is a taboo in today’s society in concept, but perhaps not in practice. We do not condemn those who are slow to sit with the “annoying kid” or those who call their friend a whore for stealing a boyfriend. These actions and situations make the victims feel awful, discriminated against, and distressed. But these things are deserved, are they not? If you don’t want to be called a whore, don’t date your friends ex. If you want lunch buddies, don’t be annoying.
But things are not this simple. What is annoying? What if you are head over heels in love with the guy your bestie only dated for a week?
Regardless of the circumstances, we all seem to be reserving the right to judge others. But as Mother Teresa says, if you are busy judging people, you have no time to love them. We have to make the time to set aside some negative feelings, get a clear head, and reach out to the kid at the table who maybe just wants people to like him. We need to realize that what we say when we are upset can be medicinal, venting can have its benefits, but perhaps we should say it to one trusted person rather than a school. Try to say things when we are cooled down and not riled up. Try to see the best friend who you have sleepovers with and not the girl who fell in love with last week’s fling that you suddenly want back.
I am guilty of doing these things. We all are. But we need to practice the three forms of antibullying.
1) Stop ourselves from bullying by being self-aware
2) Intervene and point out how others are acting
3) Advocate on behalf of victims and on behalf of those trying to stop bullying
These things are easier said than done. We have all been bullies in our lives. We have all had our moments. This is why we cannot hate ourselves for things we might have done, but we should make an honest effort to be better. We can always be better.
A Small Challenge
I want you to take this survey, read the next post, and then look at it again. What might be wrong with it? How honest were you? Feel free to post your reactions in the comments.
❤ Annie
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Take Us As We Are 